12. Christmas/Winter

Another batch of good ones - I didn’t have much trouble picking the best last month, but the quality has leapt up a few notches this time and it’s tough to single out the vote winners.



Colin Parish - Christmas Rapping

A hearty dose of humbug from Colin, and very funny it is too. It’s been a tough year for the Liberal Elite so I can see why there’s not much cheer in Muswell Hill this Christmas. Your song made me chuckle in parts and and laugh out loud in others. There’s a terrific rhyme of tweezers and Jesus, and the turtle doves/boxing gloves bit is good as well. It’s all about the quality of the lyrics and the dry delivery, both of which are high quality. The low bass makes it sound slightly menacing at the beginning, and the electronica is nicely put together. You’ve nicked the title from The Waitresses Christmas hit (albeit without the ‘w’), but there’s more than enough room for that sort of thing. Well done on another memorable tune.



Tim and Julie Warner - Base Miles

Very impressive, T and J – a bluesy swagger and minimalism at its best. The chorus works really well with the melody line of ‘we’re gonna do the base miles’, and then the multi-voice harmonies. I like the low bom-bom vocals round 2.10 and the guitar solo is a success. It’s a nicely layered song with new ideas popping in on subsequent verses. It sounds a bit like you’re singing: ‘We going to do the best smiles’, which is no bad thing. The song also works as a metaphor for laying good foundations. Excellently crafted.



Stephen Clarke – Boycott Christmas (Toys Rn’t Us Mix)

The elves are fed up of being exploited on zero hours contracts and call on us to boycott Christmas in solidarity? Only Stephen could come up with this grand concept. After last month’s recording on a bathroom floor I was wondering where he did this one. The tundra in Lapland? That doesn’t matter though because it’s got a great punk feel and the chords/melody on ‘we’ve had enough, making all your stuff’ section are terrific. There are some funny lines that describe the elves’ plight, especially the bit about them forming a union. The quiet bridge works really well and adds a surprisingly soulful touch. This is an energetic comedy, and a lament for the little man (or men). Fine work.



Phil Sanderson – At Christmas Time

The world-weary and pithy lyrics are a standout feature in the verses, as Phil's Christmas comes round too soon: “It seems like just the other day when we packed that tinsel away.” By the chorus though he is rallying the troops with a more upbeat message about ‘reconciling the differences.’ Even after all this time reviewing Phil’s songs I still find he springs surprises in tone and style – his work here is like nothing else anyone has recorded this month. I was scratching my head across four or five listens wondering what to make of the mix of whispery vocals, accordion-style keyboards and trill of electric guitars, but came to the same conclusion I have many other times - he’s produced a fascinating, eccentric, sometimes brilliant piece. The chords on the ‘raise a glass, raise a smile, try to go that extra mile’ section are inspired.



Tim and Glynn - If Time Could Stand Still

This feels both rueful and uplifting with the beautiful chorus and excellent harmonies – just the sort of bittersweet mood that T&G were seeking. The structure is interesting and unusual - a few verses to start, and then an elongated chorus repeated until the end. They’ve pulled off the trick of using the same chords on the verse and chorus (I think), while making the two sound distinct and different. What very good chords they are too. I like the plaintive lyrics, which convey regret and hope at the same time.



Rob Warner – Christmas Waltz

Classy stuff from Rob - a torch song to light up the wintry nights. He’s been threatening to bring it all together for a while and this is the moment when everything’s clicked. The soaring, joyful feel in the music of the chorus is a bit at odds with the downbeat lyric about Christmas losing its sparkle, but the energy and exuberance of the song made me forget about this. The harmonies are terrific on the chorus, and there are nice embellishments along the way, with the low male voice choir giving way to higher pitched voices on the second chorus. Great work – a timeless melody, and up there with the best of Rob’s hits.

Tim & Julie
Base Miles

This is a ‘Winter Song’ (in that it’s about running in the Winter.) I loved the feel; I loved the lyrics (a lot of things I understood) and I loved the music and vocal (particularly the ‘hook’.) The only thing that was REALLY missing for me was the giant, clean drums in the final third of the song that would have lifted this running song from its possible place as an ‘also-ran’. I was tempted to tell Tim and Julie to immediately send me the Garageband file so I could ‘finish’ the song for them (we still can if you like. We could post it online as a Warner smorgasbord.

Having said all that, it’s very competent and rounds off a terrific year from the Oakley Warners.


Stephen Clarke
Boycott Christmas

Christmas, according to AA Gill, was an English creation or at the very least was just something that the English did best. This song, with all its cheeky observations and miserly outlook, fits perfectly into the English Christmas Vibe but for a host of different reasons. I would also say that Stephen - a giant among SWC songwriters when it comes to effortless style and originality - has almost created a style all of his own. A year or two ago, he wrote a song about wanting a traditional christmas lunch (as opposed to a ‘cuisine’ lunch at his local pub) a song so good that an animator felt the need to bring it to life on the small screen. This one is crying out for a similar treatment. Though the chords and instrumentation (and vocal line) are simple, the overall effect, as ever, is one of joyous misery! Well done. Another sure-fire winner from the king of observation-pop.


Christian D
Christmas Sales

Firstly, a Body Voucher does not constitute ‘festive cheer’!!

Great song, expertly produced with meandering chord progressions (the Duffins are masters of the chord progression with altered bass note subtleties. It sounds easy but you try and work it out!)

Most of the SWC have signature sounds and/or typical approaches to songs and Christian D remains true to his songwriting colours here, only mixing it up a little with the absence of drums. The programmed Oboe is used to great effect and the melody works well; perfectly framing the sad story of being dumped on Christmas Eve. I’m pleased to say it’s never happened to me but Christian’s songs always invoke a feeling within me of days gone by. He observes (brilliantly) and like Stephen is not averse to blatant sarcasm or humour but unlike Stephen, his laughs are always tinged with more than small dose of melancholy. He rounds off a great year of songwriting with a Christmas Cracker!


Colin P
Christmas Wrap

This started out all Emerson, Lake and Palmer and then developed into Jon and Vangelis, before falling into a pre 1975 Genesis instrumental (these are all plusses in my book!!) Then, instead of turning into a song about the manufacture of Wrapping Paper, it was a genuine, English Rap! I loved listening (two or three times) to the choice of lyric (What does rhyme with ‘Turkey’? Oh yes, ‘Murky’!) After the second or third listening, I realised that it had a kind ‘Reasons to be Cheerful’ feel to it. And even though Colin decided to eschew the use of sleigh bells, this STILL sounded pretty damn Christmassy to me!! Great effort. Loved the lyrics and loved the instrumentation.


Phil S
At Christmas Time

This is as standard a song as Phil will ever write. No weird time signatures, not too much guitar shredding (oh wait, I’ve just got to that bit!!!) and a decipherable song structure. As I started to listen, I found myself wondering how it would be if he changed the key and tried his voice in its upper register but he does that later too!! I think, if I were to offer vocal advice to Phil (which he’d be perfectly entitled to totally ignore) I would say that he should try recording in a space in which he’s totally comfortable and confident that no one will hear his ‘naked’ voice, and just open his throat a little more. It IS singing louder but it becomes more…’open’ and will improve the tone (and the more he does it, the better the tone will become.) The whispering style of vocal is fine, but I genuinely feel that it closes off the listening experience a little. And that’s a shame because this is a great song. It has all the pithy observations of Colin P’s ‘Christmas Wrap’ but also has a message of togetherness and tolerance (a message totally lacking from my offering this month!) I think it’s fair to say that you’ve got the playing of guitars, keyboards and bass down cold as well as implementing effective drum loops. I honestly feel that if you work on your vocal a little more, you’ll be hard to beat. Great work.

Tim & Glyn
If Time Could Stand Still

The first chord is Christmas. The second chord (and vocal) are Christmas with John Martyn’s family (which is a good thing!) I usually sit and listen and type and then listen again and type some more. This time, I had to stop and listen. The (three?) chords roll on and the OCD need for a Verse/Chorus/Verse/Chorus evaporated as I was carried away, remembering fondly the Christmas times I shared with my family (when I was young) the New Year’s Eve parties (at the Lucas/Hughes cottage - that may be a figment of my imagination!) and the wonderful Christmas’s I’ve shared with my own small family. It was sort of ‘Prefab Sprouty’ in places (I think it was the chord choice and the drums) but it was a perfect combination of beautiful vocal/melody, great chords, perfectly weighted sounds and lovely embellishments. A winter warmer, if ever there was one. Happy Christmas to you two. I genuinely wish, sometimes, that time COULD stand still.

Tim&Julie W  Base Miles
As usual some very nice guitar playing - I like the jauntily funky riff, a sort of Sweet Home Alabama with added flourishes and a lot more clarity - which contrasts very nicely with the deliberately lethargic, distorted solo. The bluesy hook works really well, again, as if you really have just done 20 miles, but are feeling the benefits as well as the pain. Some excellent lyrical touches - the Archers' omnibus, the "effective reflective protective clothes". "Doing the base miles" sounds like a metaphor for relationships, a slog but (so they tell us) ultimately good protection against heart attacks.

Christian D  Christmas Sales
Great metaphor, and the "found himself in the Christmas sales" is a fine, lilting hook. It makes me think of something Elvis Costello would have been delighted to dream up. I love the idea of him consoling himself that he'll be able to keep the Body Shop vouchers. (Also, if he was in the sales he'd have loads of women grabbing for him on Boxing Day. But that's by the by.) The guitar sound is brilliantly clear, and the sparser than usual instrumentation gives everything space to breathe. Your production values are always great. As usual, that chord sequence in the bridge loses me completely and reminds me painfully that I only know about four chords. Not sure this one will be played in supermarkets, but an excellent Christmas song. (Though maybe Body Shop would use it.)

Colin P  Christmas Rapping
Yes, great pun. And I like your backing track, that jazzy piano, the spacey bloops and misleadingly festive synth over the farting bass. Some very nice rhymes - a fiver spent on a bottle of scent, midnight mass Adidas, and the idea that no one pronounces Scalextric properly. Very dark in a daring way, too. My song was a bit grumpy but this verges on the viciously gloomy, so at least you've gone the whole hog. Tough stuff.

Phil S At Christmas Time
Part of your folk concept album. My favourite bit is at about 1:50 when the distorted guitar comes in - one of your trademark touches - and it kicks extra life into what was already a rich, dark backing track. The same happens at about 3:10, and even during the fadeout - your songs have so many musical ideas. Those multiple voices work well, different textures all the time, so we know we're not getting a 3-minute pop song, more of a Christmas-themed tapestry. Not sure what it all means, but it doesn't matter because it all flows pleasurably into the brain. Yet again, for me the best thing is that you've produced your own unmistakeable sound.

T&G If Time could Stand Still
Great chords and an excellently wistful melody- very nice notes at the end of the lines (especially effective on "if time could rewind/stand still"). I like the feel of this, with the melody lifting us up while the words have a touch of melancholy. I'd have liked to hear more of the slide guitar, but as it is the excellent layered vocals carry the whole song, and I like the way they're set in the mix - the harmonies slightly apart. Some fine melodic stuff going on here.

Rob W  Christmas Waltz
Yes I like those chords, especially behind the "feelings to come" line. Great vocals, and it all sounds very spontaneous, with genuine regret that you walk in the door and just see Christmas as a chore (sorry, accidental rhyme). The arrangement builds well, so when the guitar comes in, the song turns into an anthem. And whatever the inspiration for the mellotron, it works because it comes as a sort of ironic chorus of angels behind the dark lyrics. Like I said for Colin's song, my song was jokily cynical about Christmas, and his was brutal in an ironic way, but this is genuinely sad, a more human touch. Redo the bass track and you've got a hit.

Congrats Christian. A worthy winner...again!!!

All the best to you in 2017.

x

Thanks - feels good to have a Christmas number one.